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Saturday, September 4, 2010

One Half Adventure Seeker, One Half Fuddy Duddy

When I told my husband the title for this post he said, with a cute grin, "only one half fuddy duddy?"
So, maybe the balance isn't quite so even, but I estimate that half of my desire is the adventure seeker though it is sometimes drowned out by the annoying fuddy duddy screaming in my head.
I have always loved adventure, but I am the type that takes a bit of convincing before I can get to the adventure part. It was easier to overcome this when I was a single gal living the high life, but with the addition of three children to my life I must admit the fuddy duddy takes over sometimes.
When I think of the amount of work it will take to pack up all three children, plan for their feedings, possible disasters, nap times, and determine what gear will be needed to make it all possible, I have to admit it is hard to convince me that it will all be worth it. It's just so much easier to stay home!
I have recently been taking stock of the fuddy duddy, however, and checking in to see how relevant her complaints really are. I mean the bottom line here folks is that I have three boys! THREE! I can't be staying home with them forever or my house will be destroyed! Granted two of them are fairly stationary at the moment, but not for long.
So, I am attempting to let my inner adventure seeker drown out my inner fuddy duddy. Yesterday, I went so far as to agree to a trip to the coast that included a day at the beach. What's the big deal, you may be asking yourself...well, I'll tell you!
EVERYTHING!!
When I was pregnant with Kyan and living in Hawaii I would go to the beach with Ben and sit on a blanket or in a chair while he surfed. I would be lonely, but mostly enjoyed reading and talking to friends and family on the phone while lounging in the sun. I remember thinking to myself how much fun it would be when I had the baby and could cart him to the beach with me and frolic all day long while he giggled and cooed with the waves lapping in the background.
9 months pregnant with Kyan
 Enter baby.
His first trip to the beach was at 6 days old. The beach was only steps from our house. I shook the entire time and eventually ended up walking back to the house wracked in sobs. Now, this was an exceptional experience that included a whole mess of anxiety producing hormones and a very mean neighbor who yelled at me for allowing my new baby to be exposed to the elements, but you get the picture.

Kyan, 6 days old at the beach!

Subsequent trips were much better, however they were SO much work. The real issue in Hawaii was the sun, and a close second was sand.
How does one protect a tiny baby from the sunshine before sunblock is permitted? Shade, right? yeah, well if you can find me some shady spots on Hawaiian beaches I will give you a medal. So get an umbrella, right? Of course we did. Can I even tell you how often that thing blew away? I'll skip it for now.
Kyan, about 2 months old

And, sand...well, let's just say that the boy ate his fair share and cried a bucket of tears over sand in the eyes. I could never figure out why I thought it would be so idyllic to hang with my baby at the beach.

just moments before the hand touches the face!

I can't say it was all bad. Kyan spent a lot of time at the beach and we did have a lot of fun...once I quieted the fuddy duddy that is!

The best trip we ever had (note sarcasm) was the one where Mama was finally relaxing into the flow of Hawaiian beach life with baby (namely because Daddy had finally agreed to carry all of the gear and let me just carry the baby). I even decided to go swimming and leave Daddy with Kyan on the beach. I had a fabulous swim and was coming in on the power of a small wave...I was feeling pretty good. As the wave swept me onto the sand I moved to stand up, imagining the triumphant shaking of my wet hair and confident grin which would prove my successful beach Mama status, I felt a searing pain in my foot. I fell over and then limped/dragged myself out of the water. I stood up again and couldn't take a step. I looked down at my foot only to see my little toe sticking out horizontally from the side of my foot. I quite promptly screamed. Ben ran down the hill of sand, leaving Kyan up top, and helped me up. I cried and shook and cried and shook, and tried to hold on to Kyan who was crying, too.
Finally, Ben had to pack up the gear in bags, put Kyan in the Baby Bjorn, and carry me on his back. How he managed to get us all back to the car I will never know (and in one trip!).
Suffice to say that when I think of trips to the beach I have some justification in imagining the disasters that could occur.
So, yesterday when Ben took the day off and decided that we would go to the beach I smiled with only a bit of trepidation. I had a friend, who has four kids of her own, who was planning on going with us, so I thought we could do it together. It turns out that she couldn't make it, so I pasted on my grin and agreed to go it alone!
The addition of one small bit of gear changed the whole experience for me! THE TENT!
Now, it's not that I hadn't thought of this before...I looked everywhere for beach tents when we lived in Hawaii, and had a really hard time finding one. Plus, Ben thought it was a silly purchase.
But, on this fine September day in Oregon he finally agreed to set up our camping tent on the beach for me.
As we pulled out of the driveway all packed up he said to me, "I can't believe this is happening."
This is when I realized how much he must see the fuddy duddy in me...

The trip went fabulously! There were a few moments here and there: Kyan climbed up the rock cliff on the beach with my supervision (while Ben was surfing). I was fine with it and watched him very carefully from the bottom. It wasn't steep, really, and he was very careful.


I was having a hard time convincing him to come back down, and was planning my own ascent up to get him when I saw Ben running from the water with his surf board.


Apparently he and his friends saw the whole thing from the water and were afraid that I was freaking out on shore. I truly wasn't. I was fine with just watching him sit up there while I supervised, but Ben climbed up and got him down. Ben was in utter shock when I told him that I wasn't upset about it at all. Of course his biggest regret then was that he cut his surf session short.


The day at the beach was beautiful, though, and I  felt totally anxiety free. The babies were happy and content (and mostly sand free), and Kyan had a great time!
the beach in Goonies


The only other snafu was on the way back to the car. We each had a baby in a carrier and Ben had all the gear on his back. We were holding Kyan's hand, but he broke off and ran ahead to a spot where he and Ben had been watching the water earlier. He climbed up a little fence and then promptly went over to the other side. When I realized what he was doing I looked to Ben first, and he was utterly calm, so I took off running. When I got to Kyan another man had started to climb over the fence to grab Kyan. There wasn't an immediate drop off, but enough of a slope that if he fell he would likely roll to where there was a huge drop off, and go over the edge. I grabbed his arm before he let go of the fence and pulled him back over, but my heart was pounding and I felt like I was going to throw up.
The whole time Ben was utterly calm. He did not think it was all that dangerous. I found the whole thing very interesting when compared to Kyan's earlier rock climbing session that had brought Ben running from the surf. Needless to say we had a bit of a disagreement about the situation and Kyan proceeded to blame the man who was trying to help him for the entire situation.
Once we got past that little incident, however, we were back to the happy, adventurous family.
What I learned yesterday is that it is likely that we will never have an event free adventure. With three boys in tow, I can imagine we will have many crazy moments, a TON of gear, and more than a few laughs. What matters most though is the pursuit of our adventures and the experiences we have together. So, I vow to silence the fuddy duddy and take the plunge, no matter how much work it may take to get there! (at least most of the time :) )

4 comments:

  1. Well said momma. Inspirational, as I have a very loud and obnoxious inner fuddy duddy myself much of the time, and I only have one child : ) Thanks for posting!

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  2. Yay! Now, y'all come down to Nicaragua and stay in our casa down there and Gibson and Ben can surf all day, and I'll help you with the boys! :)

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  3. I really enjoyed this post! I liked hearing about journey from pre-kyan to now!

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  4. Carrie, that sounds great! Ben is dying for a surf trip...I think the babies need to get a bit bigger, but maybe that's just my inner fuddy duddy talking :) we'll have to chat!

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